Depression ? Its not always "Just in Your Mind" !

Depression? It’s not always “Just in your mind”! The entire nation was shaken when a 23year old young man committed suicide after he checked into the Taj hotel in Mumbai at 3am on Monday. The young man had documented his suicide as a guide to committing suicide and had several suicide notes where he apologized and thanked his family and friends. He also mentioned the reason for taking this drastic step. The reason mentioned was, in fact, depression. Yes depression. Look at the word, read it and let it sink in. DEPRESSION. What is depression? Is it sadness? Is it wearing all black? is it crying easily? Is it feeling bad because of a break up or the fear of your parents because you scored less? The answer is NO. The word depression has its meaning deep rooted in the history of mental illnesses. It is a serious mental illness and majority of people suffer from major depressive disorders today for various reasons. However, even though there is a dangerously increasing amount of people who are being diagnosed with depression, the stigma behind it still remains strong. People who are unaware and ignorant believe that people with mental illnesses  are weak, spineless and some even believe that the behaviour that they project is merely for attention. All these misconceptions are purely out of negligence and an unwillingness to be educated about the issue. What they do not understand Is that mental illnesses, just like physical illness are equally dangerous and need to be taken as seriously. If you ever encounter somebody who has cancer, or somebody who broke their bones, would say that they are seeking attention? Would ask them to snap out of it? Then why is it that we tend to overlook mental illnesses and give importance only to a physical illness? Some people might justify this by saying that physical illnesses are visible and mental illnesses like depression are not. However, this isn't true. You just need to be observant enough to notice a person's distress. People with depression may not necessarily come out in the open and reveal their disturbances, but there are subtle signs that, if observed carefully can help us understand that a person is suffering from depression. There are a whole lot of symptoms that a person may possess such as lack of appetite, lack of sleep, isolation from the social world, suicidal thoughts ,methods of self harm ,substance abuse, irritation or anger, constant feeling of sadness, hopelessness ,etc .A person might experience an emptiness or numbing of emotions. In certain case people also develop physical ailments due to depression such as headaches, high or low blood pressures, tensed and stressed muscles, numbing of certain body parts, clenched jaws, etc. A person dealing with depression may experience difficulty in carrying out basic daily tasks and other day-to-day activities. All these signs show enough evidence of depression and is a reason why today people need to be aware of this for themselves as well as their loved ones. As scary as mental illnesses may seem, they are not incurable. With proper medication and treatment, therapies and support from family and friends, a person may easily recover from it. Recovery from a mental illness can never be quick and there are always chances of relapses. Hence it is necessary that the person dealing with it is treated carefully and is strengthened enough to fight back relapses. Recovery from any mental illness is a two way process. Any treatment requires willingness on the patients part to cooperate and help others in helping them. It is very difficult to help someone who doesn't want to be helped or doesn't want to recover. Hence dealing with depression is a long process that requires immense empathy, understanding, time and patience. Just a few efforts on our part, such as being observant and empathic, a shoulder to lean on, ears that listen and a heart that understands can go a long way in helping our loved ones. So arise, become aware and come together to conquer the battles against mental illnesses. So do you have or know someone who suffers from depression? Let's talk..... By Vedika Phansalkar Blissful Mind Therapy Centre

Creative Living

Creative living is a joyful living or living from your soul and childlike spontaneity. Many a times in our busy lives we tend to ignore our own dreams and aspirations. We work more on the materialistic level rather than focusing on things that makes us feel alive. A creative lifestyle helps us to understand this and implement these in our day to day living. It is about creating our own lives as an expression of ourselves and coming back to self.

Creativity brings out the best in us. It is a Mindful activity which also gives us a sense of purpose and achievement. On the scientific levels Creative Living rewires the brains and creates new pathways. It releases Oxytocin the feel good hormone in our bodies. It also enhances our productivity and leadership skills. It makes us better decision makers as well as more adaptive to change. They are also bigger risk takers which makes them more creative and out of the box thinkers like Steve Jobs. 

Creative living makes us more focused and experimental as well as courageous. These traits help people to look at life in a solution oriented way rather than being problem oriented. Thus they are better prepared for the hurdles and hiccups that life offers.

Creative living also helps you to enhance the relationship and parenting skills in people as they are happier and contended so they spread the same among their family. Mindfulness helps them to live in the now which keeps them Psychologically healthier.

10 Ways towards leading a creative life :

Practice Mindfulness and Meditation

Be Spiritual

Travel

Read

Pursue a hobby

Learn something new

Be non-judgemental

Adopt a pet

Do something out of your comfort zone

Make someone happy

To know how to live a creative life join our workshop on “Creative Living” for more details call us on 09167119135 or mail us on neeta@neetashetty.in

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the art of present moment awareness…it is the state of being rather than doing.

In this fast paced world we are missing out on all the important aspects of our life by not stopping to enjoy the moment but rushing into another without a pause. Slow life disturbs us and makes us feel anxious because we do not have a lot of activities to keep going. And these moments force us to keep us occupied with meaningless and non-productive activities which keeps us busy. Most of the time it is about us not wanting to take a break to stop and introspect into our lives. You just want to rush through life so that you are trying to run away from yourself and your emotions as well as to run away from the problems in your day-to-day life. Many a times work holism is a garb under which an emotional and sensitive person wants to hide into rather than facing the negative emotional or environmental challenges he/she may be facing in their personal lives. So we are used to not facing the situation but rather trying to evade the true feelings which are suppressed beneath all this layers of excuses.

Mindfulness helps you to get into the self- awareness mode where you are fully aware of your emotions and feeling which may be good or bad ,you experience it but in a non-judgemental way. You are not categorising it as good or bad but rather understanding it and allowing it to pass by. Mindfulness is not just meditation but a life style. Everything changes within you once you embark on the journey of Mindfulness. Life becomes more simple and focused. You learn to enjoy every moment of your life by breathing in the fragrance of Mindfulness. Mindfulness takes you on a journey of more fulfilled life where you are present in every moment which is the present not the past or the future. So there is less of rumination about the past and worry about the future.

Mindfulness has now being used all over the world for individual growth as well as in hospitals for pain management and other Diseases. Mindfulness when integrated with Psychology has been proven to work wonders with people with chronic Depression, Anxiety, Adult ADHD , Anger Management, Stress Management ,Addictions Eating Disorders Obesity etc

In children Mindfulness can be used to increase Compassion, developing Resilience, reducing aggression stress and Anxiety, it also helps in curbing hyper-activity and in improving focus, concentration and memory.

Mindfulness can be experienced in many forms like Mindful Art, Mindful Eating, Mindful Walking, Mindful Colouring and Mindful Meditation, so choose from these which suits your personality the most.

We also have tailor made workshops for Corporates, Individuals, Groups, Adults and Children

To know more about our workshops on Mindfulness pl mail us on neeta@neetashetty.in or call us on 09167119135.

Mindfulness

The concept of mindfulness 

Mindfulness has evolved from the ancient Buddhist practice of Meditation. it is a mental state of 
focusing ones awareness on the present moment acknowledging and accepting ones own feelings, emotions 
and thoughts without being judgmental about it. it is not merely a technique but a way of life.It is a 
art of being. Thich Nhat Hanh or Thay the Vietnamese Monk and Jon Kabat Zinn made Mindfulness extremely 
popular all over the world.

Mindfulness has become one of the most researched areas in the mental health world as well as by people 
in the health field who research on the mind body connection. Jon Kabat Zinn is the founder of 
Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction Technique (MBSR). His technique has been widely applied by hospitals 
and clinicians all over the world for conditions like Chronic Pain, Heart Disease, Anxiety and 
Depression, Psoriosis, Sleep Disorders etc. Mindfulness has now become a most popular form of 
Psychotherapy.
Mindfulness meditation is associated with changes in the Anterior Cingulate Cortex, Insula, Temporo 
parietal junction, Fronto Limbic Network and Default Mode Network structures. Just 21 days of Mindful 
Meditation has proven to change the Brains Grey Matter Volume. it is proven to decrease activities in 
the default mode network the area which is responsible for Worrying, Ruminating and being less happy. 
there is also a decrease in brain cell volume in the Amygdala which is responsible for emotions like 
fear, anxiety and stress. in other words it increases the positive emotional area of the brain and 
decreases the negative emotional area of the brain.This has been proven with MRIs before and after 
meditation. mindfulness also has been proven to improve concentration and focus.

Initially Mindfulness was associated with Buddhism and Hinduism so it was seen as a religious practice 
so people of other religions had apprehensions in practicing it but Jon Kabat Zinn made it more 
scientific and practical thus now it is widely accepted as a form of living and Therapy rather than a 
religious practice.

The five easy ways of practicing Mindfulness is

Meditation
Walking Meditation
Mindful eating
Living in the moment
Accepting things around you as they are

The 10 benefits of mindfulness backed by science

Mindfulness eases aches and pains
Mindfulness makes us smarter and improves decision making skills thus making us better leaders
Mindfulness lowers blood pressure
Mindfulness improves our empathy and compassion levels
Mindfulness boosts concentration and focus thus increasing our productivity
Mindfulness enhances resilience
Mindfulness reduces the feeling of loneliness and boosts feelings of well-being and contentment
Mindfulness increases creativity
Mindfulness makes us less judgmental
Mindfulness reduces Stress Anxiety and Depression

Neeta V Shetty Psychotherapist and Life Coach
Practices Mindfulness Based Psychotherapy and conducts Workshops on Mindfulness at BLISSFUL MIND 
THERAPY CENTRE Wadala Mumbai. To know more about it visit www.blissfulmindtherapycentre.com

Looking At Negative Emotions From A Positive View Point

Fear

It is a well known fact that fear hampers our life and growth to a huge extent. "Your growth lies on the other side of fear" is one of the most famous quotes which you may have come across umpteen number of times in motivational and self help books.As we say there are two sides of a coin, we have read a lot about the negative aspects of fear there are lots of techniques developed by psychologists on how to overcome fear but we have yet to come across the positive aspects of the emotion 'FEAR'. Here are a few of them

• Fear of losing control helps us to take the steps necessary for regaining control over our live
• The fear of failure pushes us towards setting up goals and organizing going beyond our capacities
• The fear of living alone helps us in compromising and adjusting with others which is a very essential factor for nurturing interpersonal relationships
• The fear of the unknown stops us from taking non calculated risks in life
• The fear of dependency urges us to develop our own resources and become independent                                  Thus in proper amounts fear protects us physically as well as psychologically it only cripples us when it is in excess and distorts our perception of reality. So it is up to you to utilize it for your development and growth by capturing the positive aspect of fear or choose it to deteriorate your development and growth by loosing control over it  

SKILLS TO SHARPEN YOUR LISTENING ABILITIES AND STRENGTHENING YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Attentive listeners distinguish themselves by using a variety of skills. These skills enhance a conversation and forge a bridge of understanding between the speaker and listener. among these skills are the following:

• Probing - This is used for finding out more information and deeper feelings.Be concerned with who..what...when...where...why and how.
• Clarifying - Ask the other person to explain something they said
• Summarizing - Sum up your understanding of what the other person said
• Confronting - Ask the other person to explain inconsistent remarks. Be gentle;confronting responses can lead to defensive reactions.
• Supporting - Make it clear that you agree or at least support the other persons statement
• Affirming - An affirming statement or non verbal gesture is a positive indication of your approval or understanding. It is often done by grunting nodding or by interjecting short comments
• Restating - Repeat back what another said..this provides an opening for them to continue , or it allows them to hear what you think they said
• Reflecting - Look back and analyze what has been said this adds insight or speculation to the conversation
• Bouncing - Make a statement or quote another and ask the person to react to the statement

From Stress To De-Stress......For Women

One of the best way of De-stressing in women is by raising the level of Oxytocin which is a hormone associated with the ability of reducing anxiety and maintaining healthy psychological boundaries ...it is also known as the bonding or love hormone which helps in maintaining healthy interpersonal relationship and generating maternal behavior in women.It also helps in keeping a her happy and acts as a mood enhancer...the level of Oxytocin goes down when she is not happy or in an relationship where she is the major provider or giver...when there is such a situation in a relationship the women starts feeling depressed and low...to avoid such situations it is necessary to regulate or replenish the hormone levels in the body so that you can maintain a healthy and happy mindset which can help you to deal with life situations and handling interpersonal relationships in a much better way.

     Some natural ways to boost your Oxytocin level 

• Getting your hair or manicure , pedicure done..... spend time grooming yourself
• Go on a shopping spree
• Spend time sharing and listening to your girlfriends
• Meditate or join yoga classes 
• Join Aerobics or Gym classes
• Get a hug from your partner
• Spend time with child or a pet
• Get yourself pampered with a relaxing massage
• Cultivate a hobby
• Join workshops or group therapy sessions where you get to know that you are not the only one who has a problem to deal with 

"Among the various ways of overcoming depression is to reconcile our own past and future. Change your attitude towards ourselves...others...and break your unwanted fixed habits"
 

Swami Gokulananda
Ramkrishna mission institute of culture

Seven Brain Boosters

Seven steps to boost your brain power

1. Follow a regular exercise regime
2. Eat healthy
3. Exercise your brain muscles
4. Play games
5. Learn something new
6. Sleep well
7. Take a break - Relax

Some Stress Busting Techniques

Learn to meditate - it helps you to stay in the present moment
Visualize yourself in some picturesque location which you would love to visit
Touch something which calms you like a piece of satin ,silk or a pet
Learn some breathing techniques
Look around you to notice the good things of life
Drink some herbal tea
Try self massage
Take time out from your daily routine
Try a musical detour
Take an attitude break dump your should's and must's

Ten Guideposts In Raising A Resilient Child

Be empathetic
Communicate effectively and listen actively
Identify and rewrite the negative scripts that you use with your kids
Believe in their worth
Accept and love them unconditionally as they do with you
Focus on their strengths and not on their weakness
Help them  to view mistakes as learning opportunities
Foster a sense of responsibility in them - bring home a pet
Help them to develop a healthy self esteem
Use discipline and not punishment to teach

"Be the role model for your child,be the one you want your child to be,your child will follow you"

Towards happiness

“There is no way towards happiness, happiness is the way”

                                    Dr Wayne Dyer

As the above quote reflects happiness does not exist outside u but it resides within u. U r the only person who can make urself happy or unhappy. So look within urself  to find the route towards happiness and bliss

Way towards a happier u

Happiness in life does not come from getting ,it comes from being

Be spiritually alive

Put family first

Love and accept yourself unconditionally

Choose and pick your emotions

See troubles as blessings in disguise

Change your outlook towards life

Love your irritations

Be socially active

Pursue a hobby

How thoughts control you and your life

As James Allen the famous author had written in his best seller “As A Man Thinketh” you are what you think. Great thinkers all affirm that we control our thoughts, our repeated thoughts mould our character and our character creates our destiny. A normal regular person has 60,000 to 80,000 thoughts in a single day that is almost one thought per second. To achieve authentic wisdom and to make life a wonderful and peaceful journey you have to monitor and mould the way you think and change your thoughts. Having a positive mental attitude not only helps you to create a life of your choice but also creates good endorphins in your physical body and causes you to reap the just rewards of a healthier and happier you .

A good positive and motivational thought can help you achieve what you want to achieve, where as a negative and pessimistic thought can pull you down from where you are. Weak , negative and pessimistic thoughts are a reason for many a people not trying to do or achieve what they are capable of achieving where as a positive optimistic thought can help you to achieve what you want to, in-spite of  unfavorable circumstances which doesn’t support your growth or progress . “A man can if he thinks he can”

It is the basic human tendency to whine and carry emotions such as anger, resentment, guilt, hatred, jealousy and other self downing thoughts. All of these thoughts are like quick-sand which when got into we get in deeper and deeper. So what do we do to avoid such weak and negative emotions? How do we cross the journey of life peacefully without any emotional baggage's? The answer to all these questions lies in your thoughts. Your thoughts can lead you to peace or take away the peace in your life. The more you start analyzing your thoughts the more you will see how they work on you. You can then get around to replace all these negative thoughts with positive ones one –by- one .This may consume a lot of time and energy but once you get into building up a positive mental attitude you are just going to reach your goal or destination of having a good blissful life.

Some tips on developing a positive mental attitude and cultivating strong good thoughts:

1.    Forgiving people –

“There are no justified resentments”

                          Dr Wayne Dryer

Forgiving people who have wronged you or rubbed you the wrong way in life is one of the ways to let go of the negativity. When you start applying the philosophy of forgiveness in your life you are taking an initial step in maintaining a positive mental attitude. Hatred and anger can be defined as two edged swords that not only hurt the victim, but hurt the perpetrator as well .No one comes into our life without any meaning or purpose neither the villain nor the hero, they all come to you to teach you some lesson take it as a lesson and let go. Don’t harbor any resentments or hatred against them .Anger and build up resentments are the cause of many mental as well as physical ailment. Forgive to benefit the most important person in the world – “YOU”

2.    Practicing gratitude –

    “I maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder”

-         G k Chesterton

         Gratitude is another way of moving towards positivism and good strong thoughts. Every morning before you get out of bed and in the night before retiring for the day spend some time counting your blessings and thinking about the things that you are grateful for in your life be it the health of you and your loved ones, waking up next to your loved ones or for any other materialistic comfort you have in your life. By doing so you will be reflecting on what you have rather than on regretting what you don’t have. Thus taking away the negative “lacking” and “wanting”, thoughts with the positive, “contended” and “having” thoughts.

3.    Living in the now –

Live in the moment forget or let go of the past and stop worrying about your future try to be in the “now” and enjoy what comes to you in this moment. All of our negative thoughts stem from either carrying your past baggage's or in ruminating about the future we just don’t appreciate our present. Learn to enjoy what life is offering you at this moment by being consciously aware of every moment in your life. We can achieve this by practicing meditation and living in the silence

“Meditation not only affects you, it impacts everyone around you”

Many of the psychological and physical illnesses stem from your thoughts so “Change Your Thoughts And Change Your Life”